Rain gunned down heavily on my back, drenching me from head to toe. My teeth chattered continuously, and the indomitable shadow of the trees sent shivers down my spine.
"How could this have happened to me?" I whispered to myself, anxious that the creatures of the night would hear me.
Anything could happen ...
What was supposed to be a thrilling rafting adventure with friends took a very unlucky turn. Survivor’s guilt punched me in the gut, reminding me that my best friends of ten years had passed, swallowed by the searching waters.
I had absolutely no clue how to survive, my head full of thoughts, conjuring the various ways of death - starvation, dehydration, fatigue, beasts.
Nevertheless, I trudged on, shutting away unhelpful thoughts.
The only thing I managed to scavenge from the raft before the tragedy struck was a compass, but it was as dirty as a pig, covered in mud and me attempting to clean it only made it filthier. Yet, I had a spark of hope burning in me, and it was the only thing that kept me going.
The darkness enveloped me in, as if the forest was telling me there was no escape.
I followed the tiny arrow pointing north, all the way, longing to find civilization that could save me from this living nightmare. I couldn't believe that only earlier today, I was having the time of life. But Fate had other plans, had brought me here, and the only thing I could do was accept it.
I tripped over a log, stumbling onto the ground like a blind mouse, and then I felt it. A slow, slithering movement. I did not dare make a sound. My chest heaved up and down. I shut my eyes tight, gripping the compass in my shaking hands.
I screamed without a sound to be heard. I crawled as far as I could, and sank onto the floor, petrified. I squinted through the gloom, and I saw its massive, long body, slinking through the soggy grass, searching for its next prey, desperately wishing that it was not me. At last, the tail disappeared with a flicker, and I let go a big sigh.
I took out the compass from my tight clutch, getting up to resume my tiring journey, and I heard it again. My hairs stood up and I started shaking uncontrollably. My legs slowly pivoted around. The soft, but terrifying hiss, had found me. I stayed rooted on the spot, and then it hit me.
It was now or never.
I ran for my life, literally, scrambling through all the branches and twigs in my path. Sprinting relentlessly, I looked back. I shouldn't have. Nothing could have prepared my soul for what waited ahead.
The last thing I remember was the monstrous, gaping mouth of an abyss. I fell into nothingness. Falling and falling.
Your use of imagery is immaculate! Reading your tale was a spine chilling experience, especially with the open ended cliffhanger. Well done!
I loved it! The use of descriptive words really bring this ominous story to life, letting the reader imagine the events in their head vividly. Your cliffhanger really left me wanting for more! <3
The starting of the story gave me chills, great precise descriptions!Love the plot of the story, like how you explained the unlucky twist in paragraph 4 . Great job, Yi Shien ! Looking forward to more stories written by you.....
Your choice of descriptive words are impeccable. Not one part of the story made me bored. I am waiting for more stories Yi Shien!!!
Your descriptions are so good, it really is spectacularly eerie. If you intend to write a sequel I'm sure it will be just as great. I love it!!